A Friend In Need
by BarbiesEmoTwin
Summary: Rose is back from Russia and she's in a fragile state. Christian comes across a broken girl and attempts to help her. Rose must take comfort where she can.
1. Chapter 1

_I haven't written any fan fiction in a while, and while rereading the Vampire Academy series and then reading many peoples fics, it has made me rediscover my love of writing fan fiction._

_So hopefully I'm not too terrible. It would be lovely if you reviewed and let me know how you think I'm doing._

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No one really knew what had happened to Rose or why she had left the academy.  
All anyone knew now was that she back, and she was broken.  
The Rose Hathaway that the world had grown to either love or despise just didn't exist anymore. She floated around school like a ghost. I hadn't heard one word from her yet and she had been back for over a week now.  
Liss spent every waking moment she could with Rose. I knew she had been given the option to reenrol but she was still saying in Guest Housing at the moment. So whenever Liss had a spare few minutes, even between classes she would go to Rose. While Lissa is in class, Adrian sits with her, he says usually they just both sit there in silence but we all feel better having someone with her.  
Lissa doesn't talk about what happens when she's alone with Rose, and I think we're all to sacred to ask. Plus I feel like I don't really have the right to ask Lissa anything anymore.  
Even though we aren't together anymore, I occasionally still hung out with everyone although me and Liss never spoke directly to each other. I was with them more now that Rose was back though.

Our little group only talk about what might have happened to Rose when nobody else was in earshot and the lady herself isn't actually with us.  
Adrian looks most uncomfortable whenever the conversation turns to Rose. I can see it in the way he shifts his eyes away briefly then doesn't look any of us in the eyes for more than a few seconds. I don't think anyone else has noticed it yet.  
When he is asked about the few times he had managed to dream walk with Rose while she was away, he would suddenly shrug and be all vague about the dreams when before he would go over every detail with us.  
The one thought that I just kept on circling back too though was; if someone as strong and selfless as Rose could crack, what chance did the rest of us have? It just proved the point that whatever had happened to her was much worse than what any of us could even think of comprehending.  
I'm not even really sure if Lissa knew what had happened to Rose.  
I knew from the guarded way she had spoken of Rose's leaving that she knew why Rose had left, but she always kept that to herself.

I didn't see either Rose or Lissa for two days after she arrived. I don't even think any of the teachers or guardians questioned Lissa's absence. Everyone could see the girls needed some time together. After everything that had gone down with Avery and then what ever had happened to Rose, I think they needed some time.  
After the two days, Lissa had started bringing Rose to lunch or hanging out with us after classes finished. You never knew how Rose would react though.  
Sometimes she sat among us and would smile slightly at something funny and actually look at us, as if she was trying to participate as much as she could right now.  
Other times she'd stay stuck to Lissa's side gripping onto her hand. She wouldn't smile, but she was there with us.  
Then there was one option, the one none of us liked and were slightly nervous of.  
Rose would sit close and then her eyes would sort of cloud over. Her face would go slack and she' just sit there, not looking at anything, and not responding to anyone. Her eyes would do this weird flickering thing. Rose could sit like that for hours sometimes.  
Eventually Eddie would scoop her up and carry her back to her room.  
After Lissa and Adrian, Eddie looked most worried.  
Everybody knew their relationship had changed after Spokane. Both had a fierce need to protect the other and it especially showed now. Eddie would wring his hands or pace when he wasn't with Rose, but when he was, he'd be very quiet and still, as if a tiny movement would startle her. He would retell funny stories of things they'd done together and happy memories. Sometimes she acknowledged him, other times she didn't.  
He even stood guard outside her room when she slept.  
Rose now had a habit of having intense nightmares at night.  
We'd found out the hard way that it was better to leave her be, even if it meant letting her scream it out on own, which we all felt terrible for.

The first night Rose was back she had stayed in Lissa's room and we'd all been allowed to stay really late. Rose had fallen asleep first and I remember us all looking around at each other; none of us wanting to state the obvious: something was wrong with Rose.  
We had all collected our things together and were shuffling out the door when it started. Being nearest the bed, I heard it first.  
Rose's breaths had stopped being even and were becoming long and heavy. I turned away at first not thinking much of it. Eddie and Adrian had already walked out of the room and I didn't want to be left awkwardly with just Lissa. All of a sudden though Rose's breathing has sped up, looking over at her I could see that her fists were clenching and unclenching.  
Liss took a hesitant step towards her and slowly brushed Rose's hair away from her face. That was a mistake. Rose let out a tortured kind of cry and for a lack of better word, started to convulse.  
Lissa started panicking and sat beside her, gently whispering to her trying to calm her down, but Rose only got worse and started thrashing around. Lissa jumped back and ran to the door calling for Eddie to come back.  
Rose had started to pull on her skin, dragging her hand down her neck. I pulled against her hand, not wanting her to hurt herself. Another mistake. Rose started thrashing even more violently and started screaming.  
Eddie was by my side and we tried restraining Rose as she kicked out wildly. I could hear Liss crying behind me somewhere as we manhandled her friend. Whilst trying to control Rose's flailing limbs, Eddie had gotten a knee in the gut and I got an elbow in the face. Even in her sleep Rose put up a better fight than most of us.  
Me and Eddie had finally made her still when Lissa called out to her loudly, all of a sudden Rose sat bolt upright with a huge gasp grabbing at her heart, her whole body had started to shake then. It had been a long night then for Lissa who had ended up staying awake the rest of night with Rose.

Eddie said he could hear her every night going through the same thing, that she'd wake up screaming sometimes as much as nine times in the night. Even with the couple of sleeping pills Alberta had slipped her she'd wake up around four times.

Of course rumours were flying around school like no tomorrow.  
Rose ran away for an abortion.  
She was sent to a psychiatric unit after she went crazy after the attack on the school.  
She chickened out of being a guardian and ran.  
She eloped with Adrian. Although that one was quickly dismissed once people noticed he was still here and pinning after her more than ever.  
The list went on, getting more and more ridiculous. But then add them to the whole new bunch of rumours on why she was now back again and you had a whole boatload of crazy ideas.  
When I passed by people that were talking about her I couldn't help but listen a little more carefully. I got in a little more trouble that week because when I'd hear something pretty nasty about Rose I would usually flip out and start shouting at whoever had been saying that shit.  
I may not have always liked Rose Hathaway, but I damn well respected her.

* * *

**This fic isn't necessarily romantic, but it could be if that's how you want it. At the moment it's more comfort and hurt.**


	2. Chapter 2

In case anyone is wondering, _even though I know you're not, _I unfortunately don't own anything to do with what Richelle Mead has created.

**Enjoy!**  
Oh and a huge thank-you to the people who are following and/or favourited this story. **You Rock!**

* * *

Today is the first weekend after Rose's return, and I didn't know what to do with myself. I always usually spent my weekends with Liss, but now I was sort of back to being a bit of a loner.

With all the chaos of Rose's comeback finally dying down I thought now might be a good time to think about my options with Lissa. Gather my thoughts a little and weigh my options about forgiving her for kissing he ex and then hiding it from me.

It's colder than I first realised outside and I pull my arms around myself to keep some of the heat in.

I wonder around aimlessly at first lost in thought when an arm grabbed me from behind.

I jumped and turned. It was only Lissa.

She smiled slightly at my jumpiness then her face grew serious. "Have you seen Rose anywhere, she wasn't in her room when I got there this morning. Eddie said she was there when he left but now no one has seen her." She seemed so worried.

"No I'm sorry I haven't, and I've been out here for a while. I'll keep an eye out though and look in some of the more secluded places I know around here."  
" Thanks Christian. Will you come and find me if you see her? Or stay with her and send someone else to come and get me."

"Of course." There's a slight awkward silence between us. This is the first real conversation we've had since I broke up with her. I rest my hand on arm and give it a quick squeeze. "She'll be ok Liss, she will come back to you," I say. I convey with my eyes that I don't just mean physically. Lissa covers my hand where it's laying on her skin and gives me her own squeeze along with a sad smile.

"I really do hope so. She was always the strong one you know, but it's been ten days now and she still hasn't said a word, not even to me. I haven't even seen her cry."

I can read the hurt in her eyes easily when she mentions that Rose hasn't spoken to her and even I'm surprised at that. I was more surprised at the brief look of anger that crossed her beautiful features though. I guess she's just frustrated.

Lissa turns and walks back towards the dorms, her shoulders are slumped and there's none of her usually grace in her actions, to consumed with worry for friend; the only family she has left. My heart aches for the both of them; I'd never admit that to Rose though.

I look in a couple of places for Rose. Being a loner for so long meant I knew all the best places to go when you didn't want to be seen. She wasn't in any of those though and there was still no word on her. I heard some people sniggering that Rose had already taken off again after the news that she was missing was leaked. I really hope for Lissa's sake that it isn't true. I don't know if Lissa could take her best friend abandoning her again.

I could only think of one other place. I walk a little ways away from the main school buildings and passed the boundary we were supposed to say in even though the schools land stretched about two miles more in each direction.

The last place was the small cabin hidden just beyond the tree line. Tasha has stayed there when she came to visit and we had all been here with her at one point, so I knew Rose knew about the cabin.

The cabin came into view and I could see the faint glow in the window that meant a light was on in there. As I drew nearer I finally noticed there was noise coming from the small cabin.

I quickened my step, only to stop when I finally reached the door. From inside I could hear the most devastating sound.

Gut wrenching sobs were loud and clear through the thin wood. It was the sound of someone that had lost everything.

My palms are pressed against the wood and I take a second to collect myself. I knew what was hiding behind this door, and I knew things would change once I stepped inside.

At first I was torn. Lissa was obviously the better person for what was about to happen but with the sounds echoing around in my head I couldn't bear to leave her even for a second. I'm sure I was going to be the last person she would want to see too, especially in her weak and fragile state. Rose hated being weak.

Nonetheless, I took a huge breath and pushed on the door, the wood moving stiffly.

I'm glad I took the long breath before coming in because I don't know how long I stood completely motionless.

The infamous Rose Hathaway lay crumpled in the fetal position sobbing on a deflated mattress on an equally thing cot in the corner of the room completely oblivious to my presence.

Her arms are crossed over her body and I can see the white marks her strong grip is leaving on her skin. "Oh Rose," I breathe. I didn't mean to say anything; I was still unsure if I was ready to face this situation.

Rose spun around swiftly and scrambled back until she was pressed against the wall as far from me as she could get. Her eyes were wild, the skin around them blotchy and puffy from her crying. She looked like a terrified little animal.

"It's ok Rose, I'm not going to hurt you," I said, holding my hands out to her. Rose only tried to scramble further back when I spoke even though there was nowhere for her to go. "I'll go and get Lissa for you, just stay here."

She was still crying, but it wasn't as hysterical. I turned back towards the door and pulled on the handle, hoping that if I was quick enough I could find Lissa and get her here before Rose could take off or something. I didn't even get to take a step though because I heard Rose's broken voice carry through the cabin.

"Please. Don't go." I turn back to see Rose staring directly at me. "Don't leave me," she mouths.

She looks worse than I had first anticipated. Rose's hair looks like she has raked her hands through it a few thousand times, causing bits of it to stick out at odd angels, she was wearing thin cotton shorts and a tank top for pyjamas and I could see her skin was paler than usual. I knew moroi reacted a little differently to the temperature but if I was freezing Rose couldn't be that far behind. How long had she been out here? Even from here I can see her eyes are bloodshot from her lack of sleep.

I stepped slowly, covering the space between us at a pace that gave her the chance to change her mind.

She didn't, Rose kept her eyes train on me as I finally came to a stop next to the tiny cot. I sank down slowly, still giving her chance to throw me out but it still didn't come.

I kept my feet planted on the floor and swivelled around to face her.

She's shaking again, but I don't know if it's because of the cold or because of the state she is in.

Tears are still spilling down her cheeks and she makes no move to stop them or even turn away from me, it encourages me to bring my legs up onto the bed so we are sitting facing each other now.

"You're freezing Rose," I say as I tug off my sweatshirt, "Put this on before you freeze your ass off."

She just stares for a second as I'm holding out the hoodie to her, but she finally wiggles into it. She sits there looking as dishevelled as ever in it, the sleeves going way past her actual arms.

"You were practically indecent y'know," I say with a wink. It probably wasn't the best thing I could of said but I find myself panicking in a situation as serious as this.

To my surprise and then utter horror though, I see Rose snort and her lips turn up into a tiny smile, almost like her old self, before completely shutting down again and unravelling into heartbroken sobs that pierce my ears and go straight to my heart. She lunges forward, her arms reaching for my neck and without thinking I lean closer and grab her in a fierce bone crunching hug.

For a few seconds we're still as she cries, but with no signs of her stopping I pull away slightly, shuffling backwards so my back is against the wall and pull a broken Rose with me until she's nestled in my lap, her head buried in the crook of my neck. "It's ok Rosie, shh. I've got you." Even my hand goes to her messy hair, softly stroking the tangled mess.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank-you to everyone that's reviewed so far, it's always quite special when I read your comments.

Two updates in one day, aren't you lucky.  
It's just before midnight here in London, I wonder what time it is where you're reading this.

* * *

I don't know how long we sat like that, I felt stiff enough to think we'd been here a while but then again being in the same position made it feel like no time had passed at all.

Rose hadn't said another thing the whole time and I just sat there with her, silently waiting for her to cry herself out. The whole situation was baffling to me. Rose was balling her eyes out clutching onto my shirt like it was a lifeline and I was willingly holding her to me trying to calm her.

I'd like to think that we would have laughed at our current predicament if we both weren't so out of our element right now.

When the tears did eventually stop Rose pulled back to look at me. "Christian?" She sounded confused and she looked embarrassed. Maybe she had forgotten who it was, being too caught up in the moment. She looked down seeing herself wrapped in the dark grey hoodie, more confusion in her eyes then sending me a questioning look.

I didn't get a chance to answer though because looking down again her eyes went a little wide when she finally took notice of the position we were in. She was still in my lap, her hands wrapped around my neck and mine were around her back holding her to me.

"It's ok, you don't have to move," I whisper. I could see it in her eyes that she was exhausted, probably running on fumes after all that crying. Her eyes are even puffier than before and they're barely staying open. I direct her head back to my shoulder and she follows my lead without comment. There's a few minutes of silence before she speaks. "I feel so lost, Christian."

It's hardly even a whisper; I wouldn't have caught it if she was anywhere else but right where she is. It's only seconds before I hear her breathing start to even out against my throat. "You don't have to be lost anymore Rose, I've got you," I say, though I know she can't hear.

Giving Rose a couple more minutes to slip a little deeper into her slumber I then shift forward and slide one of my arms under her legs. Going from there, I stand up from the bed, bringing a sleeping dhampir with me. I take a step assessing her weight. She isn't as heavy as I thought she would be, considering the amount of food she usually inhaled. However, when I thought about it, I couldn't actually recall witnessing Rose eat anything since she'd been back. I suppose she did look a little thinner than what I remembered; and who knows if/what she was feeding herself on the outside. Of what I had seen of her form when I first came in, she hadn't looked quite malnourished, just a little under fed I suppose.

Taking in another long breath, I shove the door open with my boot and step out into cold air. I try my best to keep Rose sheltered from the chill in the air. Her legs are still completely exposed and I shiver at the site of them. Thankfully, I had worn a long sleeved t-shirt, it was my only protection against the elements. The cabin had offered nothing in the way of heat, but it had kept the wind out. The thought of a nice hot drink when we got inside spurred me on as I walked through the small patch of woods and into the field of vision of the academy.

Rose's head was tucked against my shirt at first but as we walked her head begun to lull back so that eventually her whole face is exposed to me. She looks peaceful and serene now besides a few lingering blotches, but they disappear before my eyes the longer we're out in the cold air.

After walking for a few minutes and the closest few people finally spot us, word travels quickly and soon enough I see Lissa rushing towards us with Alberta in tow.

I imagined we look like a scene out of the movies, you know the ones; where the guy usually appears through some fog or something carrying his girl after rescuing her from some over the top fight sequence. The corner of my mouth twitches knowing Rose would laugh too. She would probably say something like she'd be the one carrying me.

They stop when they reach me but I continue walking. "Oh god Christian, is she ok? What happened? Do I need to heal her?" Lissa's voice it tight with worry and she has tears in her eyes as she pulls on my arm slightly trying to get me to slow down.

"She's fine, just sleeping. I found her in the cabin just outside of the boundary." Relief washes over both women's faces.

"Would you like me to take her from you, Mr Ozera?" Alberta asks.

I shake my head. "No it's ok, I've got her." I feel responsible for her at the minute; I want to see Rose safely in her bed. Seeing her so weak and defenceless had really gotten to me.

The three of us walk in silence toward guest housing, which made it even harder to ignore the whispering as we pass.

As we round the last corner, I can see Adrian waiting for us outside Rose's door. Word really had travelled quickly.

Adrian opened the door as we neared closer and then follows us in. Lissa rushes ahead of me, pulling down Rose's duvet ready so it's easier for me to slide Rose in. She doesn't even twitch when I transfer her to the bed.

I heard Eddie come in a little breathless asking questions but I keep my focus on Rose as the others answer him. I pull the covers up around her hoping she's comfortable. I can feel the coldness coming off of her now she is a warm environment. While the others are distracted, I lean a little further in so I'm close to Rose's ear. "Sleep tight, Rosie, we're all waiting for you." I admit I felt silly but I don't think I will ever get the image of Rose sat alone in that cabin out of my head.

When I step away, we all shuffle out of the room and then step back out into cool air. Everyone starts talking at once, asking varied versions of the same questions. I hold my hands out to calm everybody and they lapse into silence.

"I don't know how long she was out there, but if she wasn't in her room when Lissa got there this morning we can assume she probably got there mid-afternoon. She was shaking when I got there, and she didn't even have any shoes on" I say.

I'm not sure if I should mention that Rose was crying, wouldn't that make everyone worry about her more? "I tried coaxing her to come back with me but she didn't move," I lie before continuing. "Rose was freezing and I managed to get her to pull my sweatshirt on. Then I waited for her to fall asleep before carrying her back."

I knew Adrian had notice her attire when we passed by him and I felt the need to explain myself. Everyone else only then seemed to notice my lack of a layer and Eddie quickly shrugged out of his jacket and passed it over to me. I gratefully accept it and can instantly feel myself warm up a little, I hadn't even noticed that I had begun to shiver.

"Why didn't you come and get anybody?" Alberta asks. I'm not offended by the question, she just looks curious.

"Once Rose had seen me, I didn't want to chance going off to find someone in case she ran, and then once she was asleep it was the same thing; and I thought that if she tried to leave I could follow." That seemed to satisfy everybody. I didn't want to give away the fact that Rose didn't want me to leave and I especially didn't want to mention the fact that I would have felt terrible leaving her in such a state.


	4. Chapter 4

Again I give thanks to those who have reviewed, favourited and followed this story so far.  
Yet alas, I still don't own anything besides this specific plot in Mead's, Vampire Academy world.

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Hours pass by slowly. Everyone comes and goes as we wait for our Sleeping Beauty to wake from her slumber. We take turns standing guard as others go off and shower or grab something to eat. On my way through the canteen after grabbing a bite I remember Rose not eating and double back to ask the kitchen staff for some donuts; everyone knew they kept extra in case Rose was especially cranky or in a rush. She had this whole place wrapped around her finger. Even Headmistress Kirova had come to check once or twice on Rose.  
The women oblige enthusiastically and give me a large box of about twenty.  
I stroll back to guest housing and smack Adrian's hand away when he tries to reach inside the box. "Get your own food Ivashkov, these are for Rose." He frowns for a split seconds and then nods.  
"What are for Rose?" Eddie says as he steps out of Rose's room. We feel the need to keep checking on Rose because amazingly she hasn't woken up once so far.  
"Big box of donuts," I say lifting the lid quickly, "I haven't seen her eat a single thing since she got back." Both people nod solemnly.

The day was starting to wind down now. After checking the time after I had brought Rose back to the Academy, I was able to work out that I had been inside the cabin with Rose for a little over an hour. The gossip had also finally started to die down, although people were still talking about when I had appeared seemingly out of nowhere carrying Rose. Apparently, a few people had been terrified at the sight of us; thinking I had killed Rose and turned into a Strigoi. It angered me beyond belief that people were still suspicious of me but I had stopped getting upset over such comments years ago. I did take a walk though when I heard it, but that was mostly to pass the time, as well as proving to people I was still normal.

Moving passed the boys I stepped into Rose's room. Lissa hadn't left since bringing her in. She alternated between sitting beside Rose's bed, and lying next to her over the covers with their hands entwined. In a twisted and screwed up way, it was nice to see their relationship so completely reversed for once. Rose had always strived to be the best of both a friend and guardian for Lissa, but it was charming to watch Liss fuss over her so much. Right now, she's curled up facing Rose.  
Her smile is sad when she turns at my entrance; I return the small smile and place the box of sugary goodness on the nightstand next to Rose. "What's in the box?" she asks quietly.  
"Just a whole bunch of donuts for when she wakes up."  
"Good idea, hopefully she won't be able to resist. I've only been able to get her to eat tiny amounts; she hasn't eaten properly in who knows how long and I can see she's getting skinner."  
It didn't surprise me that Lissa had noticed the difference in Rose's weight, but it did make me feel better now I didn't have to bring it up with her.  
Lissa was staring at Rose intently, as if she was trying to will her awake with just her mind. Rose was in a dead sleep, she hadn't moved an inch since I'd lain her down. None of us were really surprised; how Rose had managed so long with so little sleep without totally crashing was beyond my realm of comprehension.  
"Thank-you for finding her," she says more quietly than before, still not looking away from Rose, "I was so scared that she'd left me again. I know that sounds selfish considering what she's going through right now… but I couldn't help it. Before all this we'd never spent more than two days away from each other since Kindergarten.. I don't have anyone else." I knew it wasn't a dig at me for breaking up with her but I did still feel bad.  
I watched as Lissa tucked a stray hair of Rose's behind her ear, tears were gathering in her eyes. "I'll look after you now…," Lissa whispers, "Come back to me, Rose... _please_..." I feel like I'm intruding on a slightly private moment so I look away.  
I knew I would never take up as much room in her heart as what Rose did. It was a wonder there was room for anyone but Rose.  
If would be tough for any men in their lives, unknowingly in competition for the biggest part in the girl's hearts. I had certainly been jealous of Rose's connection with Lissa at first, but since being around the two of them I've grown to understand their bond more. They don't stick together just because they think they should, or even because of the bond… it's because they've never known anything different and they don't need anyone else. Lasting two years away from the Academy proves that. The two of them without any conscious thought or effort just seem to gravitate towards each other and orbit themselves around each other. I truly pity any person that tries to get between them.

After a few moments, Lissa pushes off the bed and heads into the bathroom, maybe to collect herself? I move to the window and stare out at the small courtyard that all the guest suites have access to. I wanted to think about what would happen if Rose never got better, but that dark trail of thoughts doesn't bare thinking about.  
From where I stood, I could hear muffled sniffles coming from Lissa. I was just walking across the room to check she was ok when from corner of my eye I thought I'd seen Rose's hand twitch. I froze and stared at her, watching for any movement.  
THERE. Her fingers were starting to twitch and Rose's head was slowly moving side to side.  
"Liss," I whisper shouted.  
No answer.  
I didn't want to spook Rose by shouting. "Lissa," I said a little louder, moving closer to the door.  
Finally, she emerged, her makeup a little smudged under her eyes. I motioned for her to be quite and then nodded my head in Rose's direction. Lissa's eyes widen and she rushes to her chair besides the bed. She took hold of Rose's hand and we're rewarded when I see Rose squeeze back.  
Rose's eyes are flickering and she brings a hand up to block out the bright lighting. I rush to the switch to dim the lights. Slowly Rose tries again and once it seems like her eyes have adjusted she turns towards Lissa.  
I quickly dart out the room and pull on Eddie's arm. "She's awake."  
He in turn tells Adrian and the three of us quickly dash back inside and we're met with a pleasant scene.  
Rose is dragging Lissa onto the bed next to her, both their arms wrapped around each other. Lissa lets out a giggle that I can hear is tinged with tears.  
Suddenly Lissa jerks back. "What?" she says gawking at Rose.  
"I said I've missed you so much, Liss." Her voice is dry and croaky but we all hear it. Both girls have tears in their eyes.  
Lissa's looks like her eyes are about to fall out of her head; Eddie's mouth has fallen open and Adrian has a smirk on his face.  
"You talked, Rose."  
Rose throws me a startled glance briefly. I suppose she assumed that I would tell everyone that she had spoken to me. "I guess I did," Rose declares.  
The three of us still standing around the room take hesitant steps closer and Rose smiles at each of us in turn then pats the space beside her. Not ones to deny Rose, we all squeeze onto the bed. "Welcome back, Little Dhampir," Adrian is first to say. Rose's arm detangles from Lissa and her hand makes its way into his. I can see them both gripping tightly, Adrian has an equally sad and happy expression on his face.  
"I owe you all a huge apology."  
"It's just nice to finally hear your voice, Rose," Eddie says and we all nod.  
Rose's smile slips. "How long have I been back?"  
"About ten days," Eddie replies. She lets out a small gasp.  
"And I haven't said anything?" She seems as shocked as we first were.  
"Not a peep," I throw in. She looks at me curiously and just nods her head. I move off the bed and reach for the forgotten treats. "In celebration of your most glorious return, we've brought you something," I say as I open the lid and place the box on Rose's lap.  
Her eyes light up briefly before becoming shadowed again. She picks up the one with the most sprinkles and turns it in her hand. Lissa and I share a knowing look, wondering if she'll eat the donut.  
Rose takes a pathetic bite and chews it slowly. "Are they all for me?" she asks quietly. Eddie scoffs.  
"Not _everything_ is about Rose Hathaway, the rest of us like to occasionally eat sometimes too you know." There's a light-hearted smile on his face as he digs into the box, propelling the rest of us into action and reaching in and grabbing one. I think watching us all tucking into the donuts spurs Rose on because she starts taking bigger size bites after that.  
Within minutes all of the donuts are gone, Rose only managing two, which isn't a patch on what she's usually capable of, but it's a start. Nobody comments on it but we all do share a look.  
Lissa is tucked into Rose's side, Adrian is back to holding her hand and Eddie has a reassuring hand on her calf.  
Rose notices me looking and nods her head at herself.  
Indulging her, I scoot forward a little and place my hand over Rose's knee.  
"Glad to have you back, Hathaway."


	5. Chapter 5

I hope you're enjoying the story so far!

* * *

Rose drops her eyes and picks at something I don't even think is there.  
"Thank-you," she says, and when she does finally look back up at me, I know she doesn't mean just for saying that. There's a whole bunch of words in the look that I know she doesn't want to say right now.

After a while things mellow out, Adrian heads off in search for Guardian Petrov, as she's been the most worried about Rose. Lissa is looking for clothes for something for Rose to change into before she finally goes to the feeders today, and Eddie goes back to his dorm for some well-deserved rest. Being Rose's personal guard dog had meant he only got a few hours sleep if he was lucky and Rose didn't have any major freak-outs.  
That left me wandering what to do with myself. I didn't want to awkwardly hangout in Rose's room because I had nowhere else to be, but then I didn't know if Rose wanted to talk about what had happened earlier, even if it was just to threaten me about what would happen if I ever told anybody.

After changing and saying she'd meet Lissa in a little bit, Rose handed me back my sweatshirt that she had been wearing. "I'm sorry I cr—uh, slept in it," she said, correcting herself.  
"As long as you didn't dribble on it we're cool." She smiled gratefully at me and I smiled too, knowing she'd done a hell of a lot more than that. "You should have seen everyone's face when they saw me carrying you though, you would've peed your pants."  
Lissa's voice carries through the room as she's walking out the door. "If I hadn't of been worried you were dead, or if it had been anyone else besides the two of you it would have looked romantic."  
I laugh because I know it's right, but Rose seems a little shocked. "You carried me all the way from the cabin?"  
"It was the obvious thing to do," I shrug, "You were in pyjamas and had no shoes on. It was either that or I drag you by your hair like a caveman, which although your reputation probably would have preferred, I doubt you would have been very appreciative."  
She lets out a shaky laugh and takes a shy step closer to me. "Guess I have even more to say thank-you for then." She moves even closer, and then quickly wraps her arms around me for the worlds shortest hug. Rose's eyes then roam around the room, purposely not looking at me. Guess I wasn't the only one feeling awkward.  
I let out my own nervous laugh. "You won't be saying that when people start saying you're going soft. We looked like something from an action film earlier. You might want to rough me up or something, show them Rose Hathaway doesn't play the damsel in distress." I say it light-heartedly but Rose looks at me sadly.  
"Not even for a little bit?" That stumps me.  
"No, of course you can, Rose.. I didn't mean, uhh.." Jeeze, put my foot right in it or what? Good going, Chris. "Rose… nobody expects you to be strong twenty-four seven.  
There's tears in her eyes when she answers me.  
"Of course they do, Christian. You said it yourself, I'm Rose Hathaway. That means I can't be weak," she says, her voice gradually getting quieter.

Rose turns away from me but I grab her arm and turn her back. "Rose, this school worships the ground you walk on. You've proved thousands of times over that you are loyal and strong; after everything you've done.. don't you think you deserve a break?"  
Rose lets out a humourless laugh. "I'm not allowed a break, Christian, people need me to be strong." Her voice is still rough and it takes on a slightly husky tone when she raises her voice. "Look how easy it was for Avery to take control while I wasn't here. Someone is always going to be after Lissa, and I need to protect her.. she's all I have. So no.. I can't take a break." It didn't escape me that both girls had said the same thing about not having anyone else.

Even though Rose infuriates me sometimes, I don't shout back, I keep my voice perfectly calm. "Then who looks after you, Rose?" She opens her mouth to argue and it makes me angry, good thing I'm not done yet. "And don't even try to spin me that crap about you don't need anybody, have you looked at yourself, Rose. I saw you out there remember, you're a mess and you know."  
I don't feel bad for saying it, me and Rose had never been anything but blunt with each other, and before she'd left I think we'd grown to appreciate the honesty.  
Rose isn't looking at me, but at the floor at her feet. My anger dissipates. I want to touch her, using the touch to try get through to her more, but our relationship isn't like that. I settle for resting my hand on her arm until she looks at me. "No one needs you to be Rose Hathaway right this second. How about just Rose?" Rose was looking at me curiously, as if surprised I'd said something so smart.

"Come on, Rosie, let's just move you shit. I don't want to be your little bell hop any more than you want me to be," I said, changing the subject completely while propelling Rose to the door. Earlier she had mention that she wanted to move back into the dhampir dorms and seeing as everyone was off doing something else I guess it was left to me. Rose narrows her eyes at me before finally moving and gathering up some of her things.  
It's quite a pathetic amount. I knew she hadn't taken a lot of stuff from her room when she'd left but the pile in front of us consisted of barely anything, maybe three sets of clothes and a toothbrush.  
When Rose had left, much to Lissa's horror, the school had put her things in storage, but had brought out a box of her clothes when she returned. That was everything she had right now.  
We shared the load equally and silently began out walk across campus. After a tense few minutes I broke the silence.

"I bet Adrian is going to miss having you live so close." I see her lips turn up slightly and I feel more at ease. "He' been s with you every day, do you remember that?"  
Rose is quiet for a moment. "I knew he was there.. I knew when all of you were there, but I don't think I actually acknowledged your presence. It was as if I was on auto-pilot. I had no control over my body," she says matter-of-factly, staring straight ahead. "Not that I wanted to anyway," she tacks on quietly at the end.  
I try to turn the conversation a little more fun. "Oh don't worry, we figured you didn't really mean it when you winded Eddie and gave me a black eye your first night back." I was trying to make a joke out of it, but Rose stops walking. I turn back to her and she has an ashamed look on her face.  
"I hit you?"  
"Yeah," I nod, "But don't worry… Lissa healed me straight away, nothing she could do for Eddie though," I shrug. I start walking backwards trying to encourage her to start walking again and it works. "You're probably just pissed you were asleep when you finally got to punch me."  
"I'm sorry, Christian."  
I shrug off the apology. "No need to be sorry, Rose, it's already forgotten."  
We're walking in an amicable silence again and this time it's Rose who breaks it.  
"Christian, why didn't you say anything to the others?" We're both looking straight on, uncomfortable by the conversation.  
"I just figured you didn't need everyone worrying even more. It was obvious to me that you needed that time to yourself, so I didn't want to ruin that for you."

We've made to the dorms by then and the guardian inside gives Rose a warm smile that she only weakly returns. When we've reached Rose's room and pushed the door open, I'm struck by how gloomy it all looks.  
There isn't a single thing to show that Rose had ever been here, except on the battered desk in the corner you can just make out a carving in the wood the reads 'Rose rocks.'

A thought came to me then, one I couldn't ignore. Telling Rose I would be back soon, I jogged towards the administration building, meeting Alberta and Adrian halfway. I told them Rose was back in her room and then asked Alberta where they were keeping Rose's stuff. Telling them I'd see them back in Rose's room in a second I headed off to find a corridor I'd never seen before.

Fifteen minutes later I was climbing back up the stairs. When I was close enough I could hear that everyone seemed to be here. Opening the door, only Rose turned, the others were talking animatedly among themselves.  
I slide through the small group of people and sit next to Rose on her bed. "I know you may be feeling a little lost right now, Rose, but there are people here who care about you," I say as I hand over the two framed photographs I'd found in a small box of Rose's knickknacks.

The first is one of her and Lissa, back when they were on the run.  
The other, which Rose is running her fingers over, is of all us at the ski lodge that Rose had persuaded Dimitri to take for us. It's a brilliant photo because not a single one of us is looking. Mason and Eddie are at one end, laughing and pointing at Rose, who's in the middle with a victory grin on her face because she's got me in a headlock. Lissa is next to me looking on at the two of us with an affectionate smile. Even Adrian is in it, he's at the end watching Rose with a smirk on his face. I remember we'd only just met him and he seemed to just pop up wherever we were. Despite the awkward position I'm in, all our faces show we're having a good time. It's the last photo we have of Mason before Spokane.

I can see tears pooling in Rose's eyes and I quickly take a glance around the room, no one else has noticed yet. I feel Rose's arm move and turn back to her. She slides her hand slowly from the photo over her leg and then into my hand where it's resting in the small gap between our legs. Keeping her eyes on the photograph for a second longer, she finally looks up at me, her hand holding mine in a death grip. One or two tears have escaped and are making their way down her checks. Rose lets out a tiny sad laugh. She doesn't say anything for a while, the look in her eyes is thanks enough for me anyway. "It's perfect," she finally says deadly quietly while releasing my hand, "just what I needed."


	6. Chapter 6

P.S I won't ever be someone that says 'I'll post the next chapter only when I get **x **amount of reviews' because if you're anything like me you'll just refuse to read any further.  
Saying that, it would be lovely if you did review :)

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In the week that followed after we settle Rose in her room, the days seemed to pass by spectacularly slowly. She still hasn't re enrolled but I think we all know that it's going to happen sooner or later.  
She comes to lunch with us willingly and by her own accord bow. Sometimes she only says a little but she's laughing along with us a little now too. Her eating habits had gotten a little better as well. It looked like Rose was finally on the up.

I was taking a walk one night after classes, trying to pass the time before curfew when I rounded a corner and saw Rose and Adrian standing opposite each other a few feet away. They hadn't noticed me but they both wore sad expressions and I backpedalled out of sight, not wanting to intrude. While I thought about where else I could walk, their conversation drifted to me.  
"It's done now, I did it." Rose pauses.  
"I'm just so glad you're still alive, you have no idea how scared I was for you when I saw you." That was Adrian.  
"Adrian, I'm sorry I shouted and got annoyed every time you visited me, I know you were only trying to look out for me and I should have let you, I should have told someone where I was. When you said you wasn't coming back, at first I was glad. Then _he_ found _me_ and kidnapped me. I wanted to tell you what had happened... that I needed help, but by then he'd already bitten me half a dozen times and I couldn't think straight. I needed you and I pushed you away. I'm sorry Adrian."  
"You have nothing to apologize for, Rose. When I figured out what was happening to you, I wanted to come and save you myself. You're the only person who's ever forced themselves out of a dream." Adrian pauses and I hear him sigh. "You know I'm going to tell you that Belikov wasn't worth it right? And before you argue, I'm not saying you shouldn't of gone, because I understand why you did it and I probably would have done the same."

Hold on. Belikov? As in Guardian Dimitri Belikov, recently deceased mentor of one Rose Hathaway. A man that had been taken down by Strigoi in the recent attacks but whose body was never recovered.  
And just like that the light bulb clicked.  
I stumbled back to my dorm in a daze, replaying everything that I'd overheard. Did I feel terrible about eavesdropping? Yes. Was I sorry? No.  
Over the years, I'd developed an act for noticing things that other people didn't, something that happened when you spent so much time alone. Things like small gestures, or certain looks. I could read body language quite well, or so I thought.  
Once I was back in my room, I went over all the times I'd seen Rose and Dimitri together. She was so completely devastated when the search group had comeback without his body and now that I thought more about it, the two did seem to act a little different when they were together. The only time I'd seem him even hint at a smile was when Rose was around. He became more relaxed around her. However, she was the opposite; it was evident to everyone that although by no means perfect, that since training with Belikov, Rose had become more level-headed and responsible, especially in guardian related matters.  
I remembered Rose behaving more rude than usual to Tasha when she was here too; no doubt now it was because of the friendship between her and Dimitri. That worked the other way as well though, I'm sure I'd seen Guardian Belikov glaring at Adrian more than a few times.  
A memory from Spokane trickled through my brain. Dimitri had been the one to calm Rose down enough to finally drop that sword she'd been wielding to protect Mason's body. I'd seen him take her into his arms and stroke her hair. I thought it was all friendly, but I'd seen the way she held onto him like a lifeline. He dragged her outside and they'd both stayed by one of the vans, he didn't leave her side once, and still I thought nothing of it. That memory brings back another of the two of them.  
After Rose and I had killed all those Strigoi, Dimitri had appeared from nowhere, and I remember Rose taking a tiny step towards him. In my post battle comedown, I hadn't been taken much notice but I had still taken it all in. Both of them looked like the wanted to run to each other. It's the only time I'd seen his face show any emotion, and it was pure adoration, and Rose mirrored it exactly. Their bodies looked like they were straining against their brains to be near each other. I felt sad denying them that small moment, now I knew it would have been one of their last.  
Had this whole thing been going on the entire time without any of us noticing?  
Did Lissa know? How long had Adrian known?  
Also, Rose said that she was captured and bitten too, like six times or something. If she was anything like Eddie when he had been bitten in Spokane, how the hell had Rose gotten out of there?  
Adrian must have seen her in a dreamwalk and that's why he'd always looked guilty when we talked about it.  
I was turning my thoughts over for so long that I didn't even notice my eyelids dropping closed.

I woke up early still in my clothes and on top of the covers.  
Again, it was the weekend and I didn't know what to do with myself. After making myself slightly more presentable and changing out of my clothes I headed off to the feeders before the morning rush and the rest of the population at school woke up and demanded to be fed.  
On my way through, I noticed Lissa stomping her way back to the dorms, I'm guessing she'd come from Rose's room. She saw me and stood waiting where our paths intersected.  
"How goes it with Hathaway?"  
"Not good, she won't talk to me. I mean she talks to me, but whenever I ask where she was or what happened to her she shuts down, won't say a word. I can't help her if she doesn't let me. She won't let me help her," she says angrily. It's uncharacteristic of her. It does answer the question that Adrian knows more about what happened to Rose then she does though.  
"Who says she needs help?" Lissa just looks at me as if I'm stupid.  
"Well of course she needs help. Hello, have you seen her?" she says in an exasperated voice.  
"Uh, hello, yes I have," I reply, annoyed at her comment. "Rose probably just needs time; she'll tell you when she's ready." Lissa huffs and walks away. Weekends she usually practiced Spirit with Adrian.  
I carry on my way and tell myself to check in on both Rose and Lissa later.

It's a couple of hours later and I'm finishing up some studying when a couple of younger kids rush in trying to whisper but failing. "Yeah, the princess is just wailin' on her and Rose is just standing there taking it like, it's weird man, come check it out." Oh no.  
I leave all my stuff scattered around the floor and rush out, jogging to follow the boys. As I draw nearer, I can see there are about twenty people scattered around, not forming a circle as such but watching nonetheless. I quicken my jog, and then pause on the outskirts as I take everything in.  
Rose is stood motionless staring at nothing, Adrian is in front of her slightly, blocking her from peoples curious looks, he's protecting her. Then there's Lissa and Eddie. Eddie is pulling on her arm trying to pull her way, but I can see he's trying not to be rough with her. There are ugly words coming from her and as I walk out to them, they become clearer.  
"How do you expect me to be there if you won't tell me what's wrong. You're the one stopping me from helping you, Rose. It's like you're a robot, all you do is sit there and you won't let me help. You're supposed to be my best friend, not an emotionless cyborg, incapable of feeling anything."  
I skid to a stop next to her and angrily turn her towards me. It catches her off and she spins to face me. "What is that matter with you?" I grit out angrily. Lissa opens her mouth. "No," I say, "It was rhetorical. Get out of here, you're making a scene." She seems to take me in then, and all the people that had been gathering closer. She nods, still with an angry look about her, and without a word sets off towards the dorms. I nod at Eddie to follow her and he goes.  
I turn and I can see Adrian trying to gently coerce Rose into moving, but she doesn't budge. I look back at the small crowd and start shouting at them to move along. Slowly they all move off, realising the drama is over.  
I jog over to where Adrian has managed to get Rose to sit on the nearest bench. I haven't heard her say anything yet.  
I crouch down in front of her and look up, she's just staring ahead. I raise my hand, then stop so it's hovering mid-air between us. After a moments hesitation I hold onto her hand and give it a little squeeze. "Hey Rosie, how's it going?" She looks down at me but just blinks.  
She still has these moments, where she seems to be in her own world, not talking or doing anything. I look at Adrian then back at Rose. I stand up and take a few steps away, motioning for Adrian to follow.  
"What happened?"  
Adrian exhales a long sigh before he answers. "I'm not really sure. Lissa and I were heading to the feeders after practising and we saw Eddie and Rose walking, and then Lissa just sort of snapped. She stormed straight over, at first, they looked happy to see her, then I think they noticed Lissa's expression. She got all up in Rose's face shouting, pointing fingers and Rose just stopped walking, taking it all in and not saying a word."  
"She could be like this for hours, you think you could carry her back to her room?" I ask Adrian.  
He nods solemnly. "Yeah sure, I got her." He moves back to Rose and places her arms around his neck and lifts her gently. "Come on Little D, let's get you back to your room," I hear him whisper.  
"You sure you've got her, Ivashkov?"  
Adrian just smirks over his shoulder, "I've been carrying girls to bed for years, don't worry about it," he says with a wink. I laugh in spite of the situation and remind myself to tell Rose what he said when she's back with us.


	7. Chapter 7

I quickly walked back to the library to collect all my scattered belongings, thinking over what had just happened.

It was like the two girls were switching roles. Rose becoming quiet and unsure of herself, while Lissa was making scenes, not caring how many people saw her.

After the library, I swung around to the canteen. As soon as the lady behind the counter, Diana, saw me coming she disappeared for a second, coming out around the counter with a box in her hands. "Tell Rose hello from all of us, we miss her." I nodded and thanked her as I took the box of donuts from her. I wasn't surprised all the kitchen staff knew Rose by name. I'd come by once already this week for donuts and I guess they expected me now.

Walking through the grounds, I could hear the gossip spreading already. In a matter of minutes the entire school would know what had happened.

I picked up my pace a little, and then stopped and frowned as the dorms came into view.

Rose was sitting alone on a bench, two guys standing in front of her. I started jogging when I realised it was Jesse and Ralph. Why had Adrian left her? I thought he cared about her.

Trouble had always followed Rose Hathaway, but this was getting ridiculous.

"What's the matter Rose, you upset because you were denounced by your bestie? Everyone knows you're not a badass anymore," Ralph said.

"Why don't the two of you just back off," I said as I pushed through both of them.

"Ah, Hathaway, I get it. I'd be like that too if my only friend was a strigoi loving loner."

Rose leapt off the bench towards them but I managed to grab her hand just at the last second, so she was only able to push Jesse to the ground.

"Say one more thing… I dare you. We both know what happened the last time you pissed me off." Jesse's face paled and as he scrambled off the ground pulling on Ralph's sleeve to make him move.

I'd forgotten that. Rose had beaten Jesse to a pulp the night he and his friends jumped Lissa. I'd gotten there just as they were pulling Rose off him. I'd never seen her so... feral before. Lissa's darkness had briefly warped both girls' minds on what was right and wrong that night.

Rose and I moved back to the bench to sit. "What you doing out here, Rose? I'm gonna kill Ivashkov," the second part said mostly to myself.

"Just sitting," she says before letting out a long sigh. "I sent Adrian away, he had something important to do for me," she said matter-of-factly.

We sit in silence for a few seconds before Rose speaks again.

"Before you say it, I know she didn't mean it."

"Doesn't matter if she meant it Rose, she still shouldn't have said those things."

Rose goes me a strange look, like she was expecting me to make excuses for Lissa.

"What makes you think she didn't mean it?"

"Because I know her and I felt it. The thought had barely crossed her mind before she blurted it out. The darkness made her act like that. I knew she was practising with Adrian and I didn't.. I won't.. take that darkness from her," she whispers the last part, while scrutinizing the ground. "I told Adrian to go and help Lissa and tell her I'm not taking the darkness from her. She's either going to have to limit herself so she doesn't go crazy or go back on medication. I don't think I'm strong enough to handle it right now."

Rose looks up at me, tears pooling in her eyes. "Does that make me.. Am I… selfish?"

I don't quite know what to say at first, putting all the pieces together, why they were acting so opposite, but then my brain kicks into gear and into the current conversation. "No Rose, I don't think it does and nobody else is going to think that either. You are the least selfish person I've ever met," I say with a little bit too much force.

"I haven't been in her head since we fought Avery. Darkness must be piling up by now, and just that brief spark of anger when she saw me earlier pulled me in. I had a heads up on what was about to happen but I knew she probably needed to vent a little. I'm surprised Adrian didn't notice it sooner."

"See what I mean, even now you're still trying to help Lissa; and Adrian has been too busy worrying about you to be of an actually use to anyone," I tell her honestly.

Again we have a brief silence.

"I just need some time you know to... to find myself," she says wiping any trace of tears away.

"You don't ever have to explain yourself to me, Rose."

She tucks her legs up under her and turns towards me. "You're the only one who doesn't ask. Did you know that?"

"Ask about what?" I say as I put the forgotten donuts between us and take one. Rose takes two and I can't help the tiny smile that tugs at my lips.

She looks away briefly as she answers. "About what happened out there."

Rose glances back at me and we share an extended period of silence. There's absolutely no noise and it feels like we're the only people in the world right now.

I break eye contact first. "It's no one's business but your own, I'm just sorry no one else sees that. Whether you ever want to tell somebody is completely up to you, Rose. I certainly won't take any offense if you never want to talk about it, but we are here if you want to."

Taking a second to prepare myself I dive into the deep stuff.

"I know that Adrian knows a little about what happened. He looked like he was personally responsible for whatever was going on with you."

There's fear on her face and she draws back a little. I grab her hand for the second time today.

"When no one sees you, you seem to see everyone else that much better. And I see you Rose, the way you withdraw into yourself sometimes when you think no one is watching you. The fake laughs, the way you're pretending to be ok when you're not."

Rose yanks her hand from mine and stands in front of me, fury in her eyes.

"I'm not pretending to be ok, I'm never going to be ok. I'm just trying to live through the day. You don't know me, Christian Ozera. You think some donuts are magically going to me better, screw you and your little inspirational pep talks," she says as she shoves them off the bench, tears once again pooling in her eyes. "You don't know what it's like to have no one," she shouts.

I stand too and can't help my raised voice. "You know that I do, Rose." She just stands there.

"Do you really though? For a few years, you had them, right? Parents that loved you? You still have Tasha and people that care about you. What do I have Christian? A father I've never met, a mother who had me carted off the second she could. The only family that I've ever had died in that car crash. Mason died because I couldn't keep my big mouth shut. Dimitri he –" Rose falters and I think she's on the verge of telling me something, but she just takes a steadying breath before continuing.  
"And now that I'm not taking Liss's darkness, I'm going to lose her too. Don't you dare tell me it's going to be ok, how is anybody supposed to be ok after this?" she growls, crying with angry tears.

"Everybody I have ever cared about is gone. I don't have anybody left anymore," she whimpers, before swiping her hand roughly across her face.

"I don't have anybody and I don't need anybody," she says in a cold and monotone voice before walking away from me.

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Do you think Christian should run after Rose? Or just let her cool off for a little bit? Review and let me know what you think he should do.

Of course, thank-you for reading. You guys **rock!**


	8. Chapter 8

I hope this isn't too boring for everyone.  
Review if you can and enjoy!

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I can't let things end like this, so I run after her.

Pulling on her arm roughly, I try get her to turn but she yanks her arm back. "Don't touch me, Christian," she snarls.  
Rose has just entered the dhampir dorms, but it's not curfew yet, so I storm in there after her. I don't want her to be on her own in this kind of mood.  
"Rose, will you just stop for a second and listen to me." I was trying to be quiet, but a few people are watching us as we move through the main lounge area.  
"Seriously Christian, take a hint." Her voice just sounds pissed off right now. That voice was usually a beacon to tell everyone that if they started anything, she'd surely be the one to finish it. It didn't deter me though.  
When she turns and sees me still following, she changes her direction towards the stairs to her room, knowing full well that boys aren't supposed to be up there.

I try pulling on her shoulder once more but before I've even made contact she spins and shoves me against the wall hard, one hand wrapped around my throat, and the other one pulled back ready to strike, with a murderous look in her eyes. "I will give you more than a black eye if you don't just leave me alone," Rose says in a harsh whisper. Again there are a few people turning around to watch us.  
I don't flinch or show any kind of fear on my face, knowing that she's trying to scare me away. "You don't scare me, Hathaway," I say calmly.  
Rose unleashes one of her predatory smiles and takes a step closer to me, dropping her arms. How this girl could pull such a one eighty, I don't know.

"You ever think that maybe you're putting too much trust in my sense of responsibleness?"  
"Every day, Rosie," I whisper, my own smile tugging at my lips.  
Catching her off guard, I suddenly push her shoulder back so that she's backed against the wall.  
She follows along and just stands there, a smirk on her face.  
"How about me, Rose? You know what I'm capable of, and you tried warning Lissa away from me," I say as I mirror her movements and step closer to her, leaning against the wall and boxing her in slightly. "Do I make you nervous, Hathaway?"  
I see her look between me and the room full of people that are only just in view now that we're on the other side of the narrow hallway. It's not a plea for help look, it's a I hope there's no one looking right now, and that spurs me on.  
"Come on, you can admit," I whisper, "Rosie's afraid of a little fire." I throw in a wink for good measure.

I find myself watching her face intently. Rose is just giving me a smile that I can read and says, in your dreams, Ozera. It's not how things usually went with us. The old Rose would have just pushed me away, giving me an equally sarcastic remark before she shimmied off somewhere throwing her one hundred watt smile over her shoulder. It's just a reminder of how she's changed now.

That's when I finally notice the situation we're in. We're in a dimly lit hallway, my back to anyone looking this way, blocking any view of Rose. My arm is just barely touching hers and she's turned towards me slightly. The argument from a few minutes ago floats from my mind.

Slowly I take her hand again, waiting to see if she rejects the contact. Rose looks down at our intertwined fingers briefly then back at me. She sighs. "I'm sorry I said what I did, I know you know what it's like to lose people."  
"That doesn't matter. That's not why I ran through dhampirs dorms with you shouting at me in front of everyone to tell you." Just one corner of her mouth turns up and we both laugh a little at the absurdness of me running after her.  
"You Rose Hathaway, are the glue to this school and our friends, we fall apart whenever you're not here," I say as I release her hand, only to place my hands on her shoulders. "And truth be told, you've always made me nervous. But I need you to listen to me when I say this, if there's only one thing that you take away from this whole ordeal, it's that there will always be someone here for you," I slide my hands up her neck to cup her face, "and if you let me, _I _will always be here for you."

Without really giving myself time to think it through, I rest my forehead against Rose's for a split second before closing my eyes and leaning forward laying a feather light kiss on Rose's lips and she doesn't stop me or pull away.

It sweet and gentle, only a peck, but we both pull away quickly, staring at each other with wide eyes.

I quickly snap my arms back to my sides when I realise they're still holding her. "I- uh-" My brow knits together as I try to form a sentence.  
Rose takes a step back, a panicked expression on her face. "It's fine. Nobody saw. We'll pretend it never happened. It's not like we like each other right?"  
I nod along with her passionately. At least we both seemed to be on the same page.

I shuffled back awkwardly pointing my thumb over my shoulder, "I'm just gonna.."  
"Yeah sure. Ok. Later." And with that we both spin around and walk in opposite directions.

I bump into Eddie as I reach the door and he looks angry as he steadies my shoulder. Oh God, what if he saw us?  
"How's Rose, she ok?" There's no accusing tone in his voice and I calm a little.  
"Uh, yeah, she's alright. Did Adrian find you two?" I say remembering him following Lissa after the scene outside.

"Yeah. I followed her to an empty room in the moroi dorms. She was still pissed at first, then Adrian managed to find us and explained that Rose was taking a break from taking the darkness inside Lissa. Can't quite say I blame her. Could you imagine Rose snapping like that the way she is now? I have a feeling the entire school and all its faculty would be hiding from her."

The image of Rose going on a rage-fuelled spree sent shivers down my spine, how far would she go now that she feels she's got nothing left to lose? It was something I never wanted to witness.  
"Anyway, Lissa is feeling pretty guilty right now. Adrian is trying to convince her it's not her fault."  
"Rose knew it was coming and I think we all know she didn't mean those things anyway," I say as I back away towards the door. I need to get out of here.  
"Yeah but did you see her man? She was just so still."  
"Yeah, Adrian had to carry her back to her room. I think Rose just needs a little space from everyone."

Me and Eddie say a quick goodbye and I hustle off to my room to think about how much of a colossal moron I am.

What an earth had possessed me to kiss Rose?

Rose and I had an antagonistic relationship, we bickered and got on each other's nerves, but we'd never been friends so to speak. We didn't have the flirty banter her and Adrian had. We just sort of put up with one another for Lissa's sake.  
Rose is beautiful, the truth was universally known but I'd never thought of her in any romantic or sexual way. This made it even more bizarre.

Comfort. That's the only thing I could think of.

I was simply just trying to comfort her, trying to take her mind off things. Yes that was it. Nobody willingly wanted to kiss Rose.

Ok, I knew that was a lie. Loads of people wanted to kiss Rose Hathaway, girl or guy.

I did have to admit to myself that our relationship had changed dramatically since her return. I wouldn't say a friendship had blossomed because of her recent trauma or tragedy, more like an understanding.

What was more strange was that I willingly sought her out these days, wanting to check on her and make her feel better. I had meant what I said to her, if she'd let me I would be there.

I had a feeling I had just made things super complicated and awkward.

The fact that I'd only just now thought of Lissa too was confusing me further.

Come on Ozera, pull it together man.


End file.
